WRITERS’ FEAR

Hey, for those of you who’ve followed me for a while now—I’ve been doing this blog since early 2013—this is my 100th blog post. Kind of exciting, actually. I mean hey, I’m not Marc Maron, but I’m doing pretty well for myself.

Anyway, I wanted to touch base with you guys n’ gals today about writers’ fear. What do I mean by ‘writers’ fear,’ you ask. Well, I mean many things, but mainly the fear of rejection. ’Cause at the end of the day, isn’t that what we’re really, truly, ultimately the most afraid of? I think so.

Here’s the deal for me right now. I have this novel. For those of you who don’t know, let me tell you the quick back story here, not of the novel, but of the construction, as it were, of the novel. I have been working on this beast for over three years now. It’s a psychological suspense novel. Now, at one point it had a certain title, and it was a certain word-count, and it was a particular genre, or at least I thought it was. At one point I switched the first chapter around, mixing it with chapter two, another POV. So anyway, the point is: this has been a long, arduous journey.

For a while, in 2013, when I first started this blog, I was interning with a literary agency. I learned a hell of a lot from that firm, and I’ll never forget that experience. Very valuable. And at that point I was working on another, earlier novel, a novel that I ended up tossing in the virtual trash. (Not literally. I still have it. It’s old and not very good but I learned a lot from writing it. If you haven’t written a novel before and you want to write one, I highly recommend writing a ‘practice novel’ or two. Seriously. Find out what it even feels like to write for that length, 70, 80, 90,000 words. It’s very different from other writing mediums.)

Anyway, at the same time while I was working at the agency, I had already been working on my suspense novel for a while. It needed work. Prior to this, I had workshopped it in a professional writing workshop. Everyone loved it. I got feedback from other published writers. I self-edited (a really important skill to attain if you haven’t already. Learn to be discerning and objective with your own work).

Fast-forward to today, May of 2015. At this point, the novel has changed titles, changed genres, changed word-count several times, been read by perhaps half a dozen people, and been professionally [partially] edited developmentally by two pro book editors (yes, even book editors like me need OTHER book editors to objectively see their work. Everyone needs an editor). The book has been fully rewritten twice. It has gone through the literary wringer. There have been several times when I thought it was, for SURE, ready. And it wasn’t.

You know, they say your first novel takes your whole life up to that point to write, to get out into the world. Now I know what they mean. And I’m not referring only to the three-plus years specifically on this book. I’ve had 15 short stories published in little lit journals and magazines at this point. I have written dozens of stories. I’ve written five, count ‘em five, full-length novels, all first-drafts except for this new suspense novel and my old novel from back in the day that wasn’t ready which I mentioned earlier, but that almost doesn’t count. Anyway, my point is: I have been doing this for a while.

And even before I was conscious of wanting an agent, before I knew for sure I wanted to really BE a writer, as in make a career of it, I was writing, I was working toward my [unconscious] ultimate goal: receiving publication and getting my work out ‘to the world.’ Right? Isn’t that what we all want? Even you literary snobs out there, who loath ‘commercial’ fiction, want to attain a mass audience and receive recognition. You know you do. If you’re honest with yourself, it’s in there, that desire. It’s a core thing we all share.

Again, now, in May, 2015, here we are. And, once more, I am at that painful, beautiful, exciting, fearful, anxiety-driving point: submitting the novel, seeking literary agent representation. The book is the strongest it’s ever been so far. I have more contacts now in the industry than I’ve ever had before. I am the best writer right now than I ever have been before. This book is very strong. And yes, still, in the back of my mind, I know that rejections are likely coming.

This isn’t because I’m jaded or being negative. It’s from personal experience. This isn’t my first time submitting. I submitted for the first time years ago, probably in 2011 or early 2012. I know what the fear and shame and anxiety are all about. No matter how positive you try to be, that damn form rejection letter, via email now, stings. It hits you in this core place. And what do we do? We take it personally. We do. We’re writers: we’re sensitive, we’re wrapped up in our work, and we’re impatient to get it out there. And then some agent, some stranger, socks us right in the solar plexus when we’re not ready for it. Ouch, right? Yeah, I’ve been there. I get it.

But I’m trying to remind myself, too, of the reality of this industry. Let’s be honest: at this day in age there are a TON of shitty, low-grade books out there in the world. I heard an author speak recently about the state of books nowadays and she said, “You just have to write the best book ever; the stakes are higher than they ever were before, because someone else is right behind you who WILL have a solid book.” Well, I disagree. I think that’s a fear-based perspective of the industry.

First off, we see crap on the shelves all the time. Poorly written books with bad characters completely held by the meat of the plot only, weak climaxes, wooden protagonists, over-the-top literary novels with $40 words every three sentences just to show off, terrible premises that are written just for mass consumption, and on and on. We all know what books I’m referring to. I don’t have to name books. So, ergo, we know it isn’t a case of ‘the writing has to be better than before.’ It’s more a case of, can you land the right agent, and how will you do so?

Some famous author once said, If you truly believe in yourself, and you can’t not write, and you keep putting it out there, then it’s really only a matter of time before someone finds you, i.e. an agent, an editor, a publisher, all three, etc. I honestly agree with that and believe it. I know people personally who’ve landed agents and then publishing houses and contracts through a very unlikely string of events. You never know. The thing to remember is, due to the advent of Microsoft Word, and the mass proliferation of MFA programs, and the rise in popularity in general of writing, everyone and their mother thinks they’re a ‘writer.’

Now, calm down, don’t get all bent out of shape here. I’m not trying to be negative or judgmental.

All I’m saying is: as a book editor myself, and having worked at an agency, I know for a fact that probably 85-90% or more of the people that submit are not real writers.

Ok, what the hell do I mean by ‘real writers,’ right? Well, I mean this. Anyone, in my opinion, who dedicates their life to the craft, who works their ass off, and/or who has a very compelling, incredible story to tell and can’t not tell it, is a real writer. But the people who just kind of pop out a first draft, Google agents, and press ‘send,’ are completely in their own world. And I’ve seen this trend for years now. It’s not the end of the world but what it does do is make it harder for those writers like you and me who ARE serious and who ARE truly trying to make a living at writing and who DO have a real story to tell and who CAN tell it and who NEED to get their work into ‘the world.’ Feel me?

So anyway, we’re full circle now; back to square one. Here I am, once more submitting this same book, knowing that I might be again facing a string of rejections. And I’m afraid. I have a few connections, and I am using those, but that’s no guarantee. I’m trying to maintain a level plane of thinking, stay positive, and sort of ‘take the actions and let go of the results.’ In other words, I’m trying to do what I can; what’s within my actual control—writing the book, editing, revising, preparing agent query letters and synopses, establishing connections, etc—and I’m trying to let go of what I clearly (or sometimes not so clearly) cannot control, which is everything else. (And of course the main issue: I can’t make that “perfect” agent like my work or decide to take me on. And sometimes I can’t even get that agent to READ the work, because some 18-year-old intern is reading it and decides, ‘Eh, no good,’ and presses the ‘reject’ button. Such is the nature of Da Biz.)

I’ll leave you with this, and I apologize for the length. Just know: If you’re a serious writer, young or old, trying to ‘make it,’ and you’re experiencing agent rejection for the first or millionth time, just be aware that you are so, so not alone. We’ve all been there before. I am there right this minute, at least I’m at the precipice and am awaiting the call for yes or no, again. But I do encourage you, as I’ve learned over the years, to try and think positive, to realize we’re all on our own solo path and yet we walk together, to feel the rejection only as a temporary thorn under your skin, and to accept truthfully and wholeheartedly that if you love it, if you can’t not do it, if you spend your whole life pursuing this love, believe in your heart of hearts that you absolutely WILL make it. You will succeed. You will pass the finish line. You will land an agent. You’ll get there. So will I.

I’ll keep you updated.

Write on.

“You said it. Let’s edit.”

Michael Mohr

I do developmental book editing. Right now I am—happily—booked solid until August. IF you want a free test edit now I can do that, but I’ll have to throw you in line for Aug. Cool with that? Have an adult novel (no sci-fi please) or memoir? Email me: michaelmohreditor@gmail.com.

Also, check out my client Christian Picciolini’s book: “Romantic Violence: Memoirs of an American Skinhead.” True tale of a neo-Nazi who got out and became an activist for love and positive change. Great read. Buy it on Amazon (click here).

WRITING AS WORK: REVISING, EDITING, REWRITING

[Before I even begin I’d like to give another shout out to my client, Christian Picciolini. Go buy his important, powerful book, “Romantic Violence: Memoirs of an American Skinhead.” (NOW BEING RE-RELEASED DEC 26, 2017 AS WHITE AMERICAN YOUTH: My Descent into America's Most Violent Hate Movement—and How I Got Out) Available on his website (www.christianpicciolini.com), Amazon, and bookstores around the country. The true tale of one of the first neo-Nazis in America who got out young—after operating major N. American skinhead cells—changed his life, and became an advocate for love, peace, non-violence, and tolerance. He formed the non-profit, “Life After Hate,” which helps extremists disentangle from their organizations and get out, to start their lives over again and become helpful, moral members of society. He is a huge chunk of the solution, people! Buy his book and please: review it on Amazon. The foreword is by Joan Jett (the famous rock musician). Christian has been on the Glen Beck TV Program, Adam Carolla show (listen to the podcast, it’s from May 3, and skip to 53:00 minutes), and has done countless local and otherwise interviews about his life and the book. Make sure to pick up a copy. You won’t regret it. I promise.]

You know, becoming and remaining a writer, in today’s world—or at any time, really—is freaking hard. I’ve been writing, in one form or another, my whole life. It started as a kid, writing apology letters back and forth with my mom, after getting in arguments. It was our best form of communication.

Since I began really putting the coal in the fire, so to speak, it has been a long, hard road. Lots of rejection. Lots. Rejections for stories, rejections for agent representation for my novel, rejection for query letters, cover letters, etc. The word ‘unfortunately’ still drives a quiver down my spine. Even now, just writing about, it creeps me out. I wish they could find a less condescending way to pass on your work. But, alas: It is what it is. Makes those acceptances even better, right?

Along the way I have received publication for about 15 different stories in small lit journals and magazines, which is great. I should be grateful, and I am. But I feel ready, now, for the next thing in my early career as a writer. I want that agent. I have thus far written five full-length novels, all first drafts minus my current one, a suspense novel that has been rejected by half the agents in New York City. (My last submission was about nine months ago.)

So, finally, eight months back, I decided to hire a seasoned editor myself (I am a freelance pro book editor and former literary agent’s assistant) to take a look at the first portion of the book and point out to me what’s going on. Actually, I hired two different editors to have a look. I wanted to get some different perspective.

This actually marks a new level of professional maturity re my career as a writer. I have received positive and negative feedback from professionals on many sides about the book. I have rewritten, revised, edited, etc, and I thought it was tight, solid, firm. But, clearly, based on the number and nature of the rejections I was receiving…something was off. Several agents commented on the fact that they had a hard time ‘connecting with the voice.’

I know it’s hard—as sensitive writers—to take and hear criticism. But I have learned that the best thing you can do for yourself as a writer is to not be married to your material. Be teachable. Be open to critical, respectful feedback. Besides, no editor or agent is ever going to want to work with you or look at your book if you’re so sensitive that you won’t take feedback, that you won’t listen. Try to let down those defenses. Everything you write cannot be your ‘precious baby.’ Not if you want to go commercial and sell your work to publishers, and have a working relationship with an agent.

For me, it was hard to slow down and face the fact that, no, I wasn’t ‘there yet.’ I still had some more work to do around tightening this manuscript. Yes, I thought it was ready, yes it had changed professional hands to an extent, yes other writers had read it and given me the thumbs up. But that doesn’t always mean it is ready. What it does mean is that, after I’d put it out there and tried for a while, it was time to let go of control and impatience and do the next right thing. In this case, that meant hiring an editor (or two) and having them look at my Achilles Heels’. And then I have to be willing to do the work on rewriting, etc.

As a book editor, I tell my clients all the time that they need to work more on the setting, or cut down on dialogue, strengthen their POV, get in closer on a certain character or back off on another one, show us the stakes, create more tension, describe more or less, use action and concrete details and the five senses to place the reader in the scene, etc. And all the time, I get antsy (especially self-publishing authors because they can release their work whenever they want) amateur writers who are very hard-working but also impatient to get their work out there. And that’s a red flag. I tell them that.

Whether self-pub or traditional, it’s always smarter to take your time as much as you are able, slow down, and write the best book you can. There is no excuse for sloppy writing, just like there is no excuse for bad editing. Write your book to the best of your ability and then, you know: Do the business [un-fun] part that I’m doing with my own book currently.

And just for the record, I have done all the rewriting and am now about to resubmit my novel again for agent representation. It’s been worked on extensively, rewritten, etc, has a new title, and is in a new genre entirely. Wish me luck!

And good luck!

“You said it. Let’s edit.”

Michael Mohr

*** I am a freelance developmental book editor. I work on memoir and fiction. Right now I am booked until August but I can add you into a slot for that time. Interested in a test edit? Email me at: michaelmohreditor@gmail.com. I look forward to reading your work.

Find my fiction online at Alfie Dog Press. My stories are 66 cents each!

Find me on Twitter at @Michael_Editor

NOAH LUKEMAN’S “THE FIRST FIVE PAGES”/SHOWING VERSUS TELLING

“It is the writer’s job to show us what his characters are like, not by what he says about them, or what they say about one another, but by their actions. A writer can spend a page telling us his protagonist is a crook, or he can show it in one sentence, by simply describing his taking a twenty-dollar bill from someone’s pocket, and letting the reader judge for himself.” Noah Lukeman, “The First Five Pages,” under the chapter “Showing Versus Telling,” page 119.

Noah Lukeman is a fairly well-known NYC-based literary agent who’s represented authors from all over the place, many who’ve landed NYT bestselling novels, and won dozens of fancy writing awards. He also wrote this thin, helpful book, “The First Five Pages.”

My mother gave me this book—she’s also a writer; check her work out at Alfie Dog Press (Lori Mohr)—about three years ago and I immediately stuffed it behind my computer on my huge maple writing desk. Over time, other books—read or not—piled on top of it. I basically forgot about it.

Then, recently, after receiving helpful though frustrating and also obvious (now that I think about it) feedback from a pro book editor on my newest novel, I noticed “The First Five Pages” staring at me from the corner of my desk. Whipping it out, I blew off the dust and stared at it, blank-eyed. Then I popped it open and started reading. And, believe me, though it is from 2000, fourteen years ago, it is still helpful and very relevant to today’s writing industry.

The three main things my book editor told me—as I tell 98 percent of my new writer clients myself—were that I had these pivotal issues: 1) I was telling and not showing; 2) My characters lacked emotion; and 3) I have a tendency to ‘info dump.’

Now, what’s infinitely both funny and irritating about this—to me—is that, as a freelance book editor myself, I tell my clients this all the freaking time. Show don’t tell! Don’t explain or summarize what the character(s) did: Show them doing it with action! Action speaks louder than words. True. Action also speaks louder than summary. It’s true.

Anyway, because of this feedback, which I knew was accurate—hence why I was annoyed—I opened “The First Five Pages.” In it, I found the section titled “Showing Versus Telling.” And it was brilliant. Lukeman keeps it simple, clear, and concise; to the point. When starting your novel, it’s really the first five pages that have to shine the brightest. An agent is going to be able to tell A) If you can write at all; B) If you can set up the characters and the world well (and be believable); and C) If you can SHOW the characters in actions that effectively demonstrate who they are, what their personalities are, and make us care.

That last part, making us care, is probably the hardest part. Too often, prose falls into either the boring sphere, or the unsympathetic sphere. In either case, the reader will put the book down and say, “You know what? I just don’t care about this character.”

In my case—with my latest novel—even though I am a book editor, I ended up telling and summarizing and info dumping, rather than simply showing the characters through their actions, particularly the protagonist. Instead, I barraged the reader with bland, CBS-style reportage facts, and left the characters personality-less. Really, what I should have been doing is creating fun, believable, and interesting characters through actions: Them doing and saying things, the whole time making sure everything they do and say both includes tension and conflict and moves the plot.

“Remember: Above all, readers like to make a text their own. This is why they stay with a book: to sympathize, empathize, project.” Lukeman, “The First Five Pages,” page 120.

Again, what Lukeman is pointing to is: You don’t have to tell the reader everything that happens. You don’t have to info dump on us. Instead, create interesting characters that act and talk and move and DO things, and keep it somewhat vague and mysterious while also showing that the plot is moving forward. We learn and feel emotionally bonded to characters experientially, as readers. This means that we empathize when a character DOES something we can understand and relate to. Information doesn’t do much. Think about it: When a political pundit or news man/woman SAYS something related to a story, it’s rather boring. But when they move to the screen and SHOW it, especially live, all of the sudden it becomes a very real, very visceral experience. It’s the same in writing.

And Lukeman points out in the quote above that, also, readers like to create their own roadmap in a book; they like to use their own imagination. This means that a good, conscious writer can skillfully create only what is absolutely essential in a novel to get the reader started, and the reader will do the rest. The days of two-paragraph-long physical descriptions of characters of such authors like Charles Dickens or Jane Austin; those days are long over. A sentence, maybe two, and then get out; get back into the story. Sure, that might partially be America’s ADHD hyperactive can’t-focus-for-more-than-one-minute issue, but it’s also because readers have become much more evolved regarding the world of the imagination. And, also, writing itself has evolved.

If you’re a new writer out there, trying to figure out how to pump out that first chapter; how to even start your novel, try some practice. Try writing the first five pages of your novel, or an idea you have for a novel. Just for fun, create a character that only acts and talks; no info given, or very little. See how that feels. Try to inject some emotion into the characters, but not over-the-top; not sentimental, but SHOW the emotion through their actions and words. Show that five pages to a few people you trust. See what they think. I know, for me, that I have a tendency to tell and not show, and a tendency to provide too much info and even force characters to do things to move the plot, instead of allowing the characters to ‘act on their own integrity.’ Try to eliminate 90-100 percent of that info and telling and, just for fun, for practice, only develop a character to show. You just might enjoy it and learn. I did. And definitely go buy a copy of “The First Five Pages,” by Noah Lukeman.

Write on!

“You said it. Let’s edit.”

Michael Mohr

**Want to read my published stories? Click here. You can buy them for 66 cents each.

**Want to read my client Christian Picciolini’s book, “Romantic Violence: Memoirs of an American Skinhead”? Click here. (True tale of a neo-Nazi turned social activist for love, tolerance and diversity! Powerful tale. Was just released April 28!)

**Need book editing? I am a developmental book editor. Have an adult novel or memoir that needs help getting to the next level? Email me: michaelmohreditor@gmail.com. Keep in mind that right now I am fairly booked until the end of summer. However, time slots often do open due to various causes, such as client emergencies, financial concerns, rewriting time, etc. So get in line!